I spent many hours today with my iPhone. I backed it up first, took photos of each of my screens, then I erased all settings and data. Took it back to brand new, and set it up from scratch with with the correct Apple ID. At some point in the process, Anne's iPad and my iPad got set up to accept iMessage and Facetime with the iPhone's phone number. Why does this crap happen? I turned it off on Anne's iPad and kept going.
I have a lot of apps. Oh yes, a great many apps. Hundreds of apps. Each one has a login and data. I entered them all and brought the data down again. It's all working again, mostly. It's probably about 90% set up now, and I'll finish it over the next few days. I didn't bother installing some apps, and I did install some extras.
I think I have Facetime and iMessage working again correctly. I'll test that with a few people next few days and make sure it's good.
One thing I'll be doing a lot of in the next few days is turning notifications off for a lot of apps. There's a lot of apps that have an over-exaggerated sense of their own importance.
I turned Siri back on, but set it to a female Australian voice this time. Oh dear, it's flat and nasal and sounds not-good. Is that what I sound like? Oh dear. I think I'll experiment with other Siri voices before I turn it off.